Saying Goodbye to Grandma

10 days ago, Grandma Curtis passed away.  It's been hard saying goodbye to her, even though we kinda knew it was coming.  Part of what makes it hard is that we were planning to have Thanksgiving with her this year...the first time this branch of the family has shared that meal in over 20 years.  It's kind of a big deal.  And even though I'm happy for Grandma, and so grateful that she's no longer tired or in pain, I'm sad for us because our family has lost an amazing person.  For someone so small, she was larger than life. The stories she told...and what's crazy is, they were mostly true.  Grandma's life, from start to finish, was one big adventure.  One of the reasons I loved her is that she loved James, unconditionally, and was probably his biggest fan--every child needs to be loved like that.  There's so much I could say about Grandma.  She was a mess, she was fun, she was thoughtful and kind...she loved our kids and never failed to ask about them, or me, or James, depending on who she was talking to.  She wasn't self-centered, even when she probably had the right to be.  A couple of years ago we had the opportunity to have Grandma visit for a long November weekend, which was the most time I ever spent with her all at once.  We had fun, but the best part was just talking to her.  Grandma and I were so very different--she's way more fun and adventurous than I am!--but we had a love of family in common.

It's hard letting go of Grandma, and we already miss her.  James wrote a beautiful note about her if you've got a few minutes.  Yesterday at the service he read it, and I was struck once again by what an amazing man he's grown to be.  I give Grandma and Granddaddy lots of credit for the man he is, and I'm forever grateful to them for that.

Tatertots and Jello is giving away a Cameo!

Y'all know there's a new Silhouette, right?  This one cuts 12" (mine only cuts 9") and it's supposed to be quieter and all kinds of better.  I would love, love to win one...and you can, too!  Head over to Tatertots and Jello and she's got tons of ways you can win!  Good luck--I do hope one of us wins!  Of course, I'm pulling for ME...but I'd be happy for you, too.  I guess.

What are you waiting for?  Go enter!!

http://tatertotsandjello.com/2011/11/bonus-giveaway-silhouette-cameo

Cooper's ABCs

One more post on Cooper's shower gifts...Mandy fell in love with this alphabet wall

http://projectnursery.com/projects/emersons-nursery/

and wanted to have a personalized one for Cooper's room. 

 I got to choose my 2 letters, and I immediately knew I wanted C for cars and Z for zebra.  I had fun!

C is for Cooper

Mandy's baby shower was last week, but I was unable to attend.  I had a little fun with Cooper's onesies--I saw these cute tie monthly stickers on the BabySmiles Etsy shop a while back and was waiting for just the right little guy.  By the way, I love, love BabySmiles--I think I'll be buying my stickers from them exclusively from now on (and nope, she didn't pay me to say that!).  But, if you DO buy from her and you send her pics of your baby in her stickers to use in her shop, she'll give you a discount.  Cool, huh--we all want to show off our kiddos!

But back to Cooper.  I've been saving a Harry & David tin for a year...I just knew the right gift would come along.  I had to do a little work to cover up the MooseMunch logos, but luckily James helped out (a lot.  Like, he did the graphic for me.  Love him!).

Here's the finished product...I had a lot of fun.  I realized too late that I only distressed the big graphic on the top of the tin, and not the little ones around the sides.  Whoops!  

Hope Mandy and Shane like them as much as I do.  I've still got a little more to do for this family, but I'll show you after they see it!  :)

A Fresh Look at an Old Favorite

I woke up this morning with this song in my head.  (Note:  I woke up 52 minutes ago--I'm teaching online this month which means that Friday mornings are grading mornings.  Yet here I am, not *quite* grading, yet.)  After I finished my quiet time, I flipped open my Bible to this verse because the song was still running through my head.

There was a reason this was running through my head.  Have you read the REST of this paragraph?  It starts out with Paul thanking the church for their concern for him, and for showing it.  (Interesting that he adds that, no?)  And then it goes on...

"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through him who gives me strength."  
Philippians 4: 11-13 (NIV)

This has been such a struggle for me the past few months.  I *say* I am content, I *think* I am content...but then what I say and do proves otherwise.  I feel so sorry for my Boy, because the deeper I get into the "For Women Only" Bible study, the more I am aware of the mixed signals I am sending to him and how damaging that can be.  (Thanks for loving me through it, Boy-o.)  I am forever saying, I love our home, even if it's small.  Or something like that.  True contentment:  I love my home.  (I DO!--I am coming to think that this is a bad habit, adding a "but" to the end of a happiness/contentment statement...lest anyone think I'm too happy or think my life is "perfect."  But maybe that's another post.)

And another one:  We've learned to live within our means.  (Great.)  But I almost always chase that statement with another about how our means are a small house and old cars.  (Ouch.)

And the one that's really sticking in my craw:  I am CONSTANTLY complaining about my car.  It's got what I consider to be a LOT of cosmetic damage.  And we keep choosing to do other things with our money--it really doesn't make sense to fix it, and I *know* this.  So why do I keep complaining?  Why am I embarrassed, when I ought to go back to being grateful that I get to drive exactly the car I want...I love my car!  I don't love the dents and dings and broken bumper and big pink scratch (vandalism...really??)...but I love my car, and I'm so grateful to have a reliable vehicle that takes me/us SO MANY PLACES.  I live 80 miles from work, for goodness sake--it's a good car.

I'm not sure what's going on with me this fall, but I'm really struggling with contentment and selfishness.  And it's almost worse that I'm hyperaware of it, because then I get grumpy with myself and I know that makes me not a lot of fun to be around.

But through it all, my Boy remains, and loves me anyway.

That reminds me of Someone else, who gives me so much grace and loves me despite my sin and selfishness.

I am incredibly, incredibly blessed.  And I pray this season of discontent passes soon.  Like, today.  Maybe now that it's out there I'll move past it...I find that keeping it inside just makes it worse.

So we'll see, right?

How 'bout you?  Content or not so much?  Do your actions match your words, or are you a big ol' hypocrite like me?

It's not you, it's me.

Dear Blog,

I know I've been a little distant.  I've got lots on my mind, and I just can't get my thoughts organized enough to write.

Wait, no.  I owe you more than that.

Blog, there's someone else.

Someone I can just click on for a few minutes of mindless entertainment.

I don't even have to DO anything.

I feel the same way about this new one as I did about you a few years ago...I can't get enough of it.  When I'm not looking at it, I'm thinking about it.

I DO still love you, Blog.  You've been there for me through thick and thin, and I've got big plans for us.  Don't give up on me.

By the way, if you need me, I'll be on Pinterest.

Love,
me

at a loss

for the first time in a while, I'm at a loss for words.

and there you have it.